Social state vs. Multi generational households

Many people write me hate mail saying I do not understand. Without the social state people will suffer. They rant how I am heartless.  I think quite the contrary, it is they whose eyes are closed and hearts are aimed at promoting greater human suffering. Their rants give them feelings of moral superiority because they feel more compassionate than I. I think that is a premature judgement on me.

My wife stays home and cooks all our meals. It saves a lot of money if you know how to cook and grow your own vegetables, and you do not need the government and can live on little money

Government is replacing family

I grew up in the USA but lived a good part of my life in Poland.  I lived under basic economic conditions and physical challenges, that most people in the USA will never understand, yet I was happy. I never expected anything from the government and paid my taxes; to that giant black hole like out of a science fiction movie consumes everything.

Grandmother at the farm are the ultimate in daycare. Both enjoy the experience and memories.

I think the foundation for life starts and ends from the cradle to the grave, not with the government but with something called family. If people argue for government assistance and the extension of government, I would counter them by asking, what about believing in family, an extened multi generational family if you will. It worked for one million years of human evolution, and in the animal world, why must we throw it out and replace with government cradle to the grave?

My wife’s family has four generations in the same household farm-house. This is the way it is done in places without a large governmental social state money pouring down from the capital. Families stay together and take care of each other. What is so wrong with family care instead of government care?

Great grandmother and child live in the same home and take care of each other. Why is that wrong?

Where family does better than government

  • Values – The old and wise teach teenagers about moderation and unconditional love. For example, values like in Amish communities or Eastern Europe like in Poland are at the center of life, and are transmitted by the parents, mostly by the mother at home. The kids from these subcultures in my observation are pretty polite nice kids.
  • Economics – If a family member is out of work, there is always a home for them. Even in my family, I have two brothers and two sisters and a lifelong childhood friend, and they are always invited to stay with me as long as they need as well as my wife’s family if they were ever in economic trouble. I could not ever imagine a scenrio where my daughter is not welcomed in my house. I could live with my wife’s family without any question. My wife’s sister’s husband lived with them for ten years while they built a house next door (paid in cash).  Friends and family take care of each other, not the government. What is so wrong with that?
  • Health care –  In Eastern Europe you can pay the doctor directly cash and it is very cheap compared to the screwed up system of US Medicaid and disability and insurance billing which inflated everything to dizzying highs. If someone is sick, family members take care of them. Nursing homes are unknown. People die in their homes with their families. I personally wonder if some people are euthanized indirectly in the USA, in these places to save money; in my experince I think so. Home is a wonderful place to be, a system  it is not, rather a place of love and acceptance. I personally do not have health insurance. I pay cash. I also do natural things to stay healthy like excerise/yoga, diet and vitamins/herbs, for me they work. I also believe in science and think adult stem cells are the future. But none of these things are covered by national health insurance. Instead, I am paying for my neighbor, who is on disability, yet an hour ago I saw haul a case of beer out of her trunk. I pay for her medication while, I have to sweat and do Bikram yoga. I go to the doctor they want to do a CAT scan (high radiation) not an MRI because of insurance. The doctors here, when I mention some treatments in Europe, they arrogantly chuckle, as they have rigid guidelines and regulations. I think family care and free choice is the way to go, not more government.
  • Parents – Why does government policy support single families at the expense of families that are together? Not to go into detail here, but the government promotes indirectly the break up of families. More people than not I know are from broken homes now. Maybe it is trendy or easier. I can not image me ever leaving my wife. I mean cheating or arguing or whatever, you stay together for better or worse. Luckily my wife and I get along perfectly and do not do that, but if people have children what about staying together?
  • Family or government? – Governmental ideas of promoting the greater good only sound nice from the mouths of politicians, but in practice impoverish us all.  On the other hand, families on all levels is warmer, more compassionate, fairer. Government is unfair and causes society to disintegrate (for example the USSR) and has caused generations of humans to suffer. Even democratic governments create endless wars, bailouts of banks, money transfers to people who do not deserve it, banking system that creates economic tsunamis and ignore good hard-working families. Why? Because they have blown their load (debt) on the former. Multi generational households or Family is a better solution than government.
Taking care of yourself and living a rustic life can be one of the most fulfilling experiences and you do not need the government and will stay lean and fit in the process. My wife's family farm in the backyard and old cart.

What is your vision of the USA? A country which is family centered and compassionate or large debt, bureaucracy and restrictive laws which creates perpetual dependency until we are all dragged down into despair?

4 Replies to “Social state vs. Multi generational households”

  1. Very idealistic. But much of what you write is unworkable. Unless you want to wind the clock back a 100 years or more. From a technical perspective, we are communicating through a modern infrastructure developed in the last 50-100 years. So at one moment you are writing on a word press blog running on a fancy server perhaps time zones away from your computer, you show a photo of an a wagon under a wood shed.
    Perhaps what government social programs are doing is leveling the economic playing field. The same playing field that is being destroyed by the technology we all embrace because its just the nature of the technological beast.
    The despair I discovered in this life is when you thought you had a family that cared and during time of need they stayed as far away as possible for their own selfish needs.

    1. Mark Biernat says:

      Unrealistic In what way, that families stay together and take care of each other based on moral belief in a greater good?

      It works in much of Europe, Asia, South America and Africa and I do not mean just the lesser developed countries. I do not think it is unrealistic unless you talk to an American with high expectations about material success programmed in from early on, and values.

      Granted not every family story is a fairy-tale and like the Waltons or the Brady Bunch, but that does not mean you can not strive to an ideal. I believe in reinventing yourself dispite tragic fate and situations in family. I believe God watches over us and with prayer amazing things can happen. I do not want to replace my hope in myself and God with the government and I think this is what people are doing.

      You do not need much to live in the USA. I spend maybe 1,400 dollars a month live on a semi-tropical island in a luxury condo on the beach in Florida, only eat organic food (almost), we are a family of three.

      I could live for less, if I did not live such a opulante lifestyle. So I think American over-estimate what keeping up with the Jones mean and they have expectations from the cradle to the grave on how life should look, if it does not they are hoping the government should fill in the gaps.

      I think Americans have been sold the idea that the social state is the answer in life to economic hardship and believe hardship kicks in when they can not pay their mortgage for their huge 1000 square foot house, or car payments. My answer is what about riding a bike, and living like many people in he world in a 500 square foot house. I knew several doctors in Poland that lived in this size flat and their family seemed happier than many Americans underwater with their personal balance sheet.

      Tragically, the only thing left is a just a disagreement on the degree in which the social state plays a role.

      What about rugged individualism and the frontier and immigrant attitude that built this country?
      My message is, let families, like one million years of evolution has tested, stay and care for each other.
      I think the American experiment of testing socialism will lead to a unrecoverable course that Spain or Greece find themselves in. That is a Byzantine class system based not on merit but government workers and transfers. A bureaucracy that can not be undone.

      I mean even something like social medicine, something that is not a huge wrong, as many modern European countries have a two tier system will damage the advancement of medicine immensely. I would rather get adult stem cell therapy and exercises and take supplements than the old fashion fill a prescription to treat the symptoms and have the government pay the bill.
      The free market is developing things like adult stem cell therapy that treats the root cause, while government medicine drains resources as it pays for pills with treat the symptoms.

      The government taking care of people pales in compassion to having a loving family to take care of you when you are old.

  2. Multi Generational families are the norm in many asian cultures.
    My family has been living as a “traditional” Indian family for the last 14 years. My Parents and an Aunt live with us.

    My wife and I decided that this lifestyle would impart family values to my son. As my son has gotten older he has come to value his family and when my parents or aunt are away he feels that a large part of his family is missing.

    Multi Generational family life is possible even in the USA.

    1. Mark Biernat says:

      I would have no problem if my daughter when she grows up lives with us and I have no problem if we had to live with my parents or in-laws. Or if my brothers or sisters needed help they can live with us. I think family is family. Now life in a mobile economy changes things, and we all move all over the country to get jobs, but they are always my family and my door is always open for my family. I live in the USA now. You are right they work if people have respect for the family.

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